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One correct prediction goes to The Closer's head
Thursday, Oct. 29, 2009
Posted
at
10:34 am
TODAY'S LINEUP
A daily look at the top sports stories in this morning's edition of The Herald:
1. End of the line for perennial Pro Bowler?
The news that Walter Jones won't play this weekend was expected. The news that he's done for the season after being placed on IR? Well, that doesn't sit so well. Jones's health problems could spell the end of the line for the aging superstar. And when it comes to superstars, Jones is all the Seahawks have got right now.
2. Where kissing your sister is considered entertainment
The Seattle Sounders FC makes it postseason debut at Qwest Field tonight, and the city couldn't be more excited. The Sounders and Houston Dynamo are going to put their scarves up, and one of them might actually score a goal. Because of the way the MLS postseason works, it won't matter if neither team does.
3. This guy could really use the bye week
Figure this one out: the Huskies have lost four of five games, linebacker E.J. Savannah has broken three bones in his hand, and Savannah is loving every minute of it. The senior linebacker seems to be a glutton for punishment. Maybe he should try out for the St. Louis Rams next season?
4. Silvertips heat up on the Ice
A two-man advantage helped the Silvertips start their road trip with a 4-1 win over the Ice on Wednesday night. A two-man advantage? That sounds like what the Oregon football team had on the Huskies last weekend.
THE WARMUP PITCH
Cheesesteaks are on the house tonight
As The Closer correctly predicted, a former Cleveland Indians pitcher won Game 1 of the World Series on Wednesday night. Cliff Lee's complete game led the Philadelphia Phillies to a 6-1 victory, and The Closer looked like a genius once again. While I don't like passing on my picks, it's difficult to keep this much genius inside. And so I'll give a few more future predictions, just to remind everyone how smart I am: the UW football team definitely won't lose Saturday, the Heisman Trophy winner won't repeat, and there won't be a repeat of the Rams-Titans Super Bowl. There, I said it. Watch and learn.
And the Husky women are also ranked 13th … in the Pac-10
The first official men's college basketball poll came out today, and UW is ranked 13th in the country. And the Huskies' conference schedule doesn't look too daunting, seeing as how Cal was the only other Pac-10 team to make the rankings. Sounds like all those Pac-10 lotto picks over the last couple years have finally caught up to the West Coast teams. (Oh, and if you're looking for Gonzaga in the poll, keep looking. The Pargo-less, Heytveldt-less, Daye-less Zags are no longer considered among the nation's elite.)
We're surprised Clay Bennett didn't try to steal Brockman, too
The Oklahoma City Stolen Thunder welcomed a pair of familiar faces in for their season opener Wednesday night. Coach Paul Westphal and his favorite rookie, The King of Snohomish, couldn't lead the Sacramento Kings to a win in the NBA's most unfortunate city. Snohomish's Jon Brockman had four points and a rebound in six minutes off the bench as the Kings lost 102-89 to our least-favorite team. If only the Snohomish farm boy could've had a few minutes with Clay Bennett in an elevator, just the two of them, to settle this whole Sonicsgate thing like men.
Taken out behind the Shaq and beaten like the old Cavaliers
One of the favorites to win the East dropped its second game in as many chances Wednesday night when the Cleveland Lebronaliers lost 101-91 despite a triple-double from their King . That signing of The Big Aristotle is looking about as helpful as if the Cavs had signed … well, Aristotle.
CURVE BALLS
The wild and wacky news from the world of sports …
The old phrase “any publicity is good publicity” doesn't apply here
The Minnesota Vikings made big news this week, and it didn't have anything to do with that 40-year-old QB. The team Web site made an unbelievable error by reporting that an ex-player, Orlando Thomas, had passed away. Not sure if this qualifies as entirely “good” news, but Thomas is actually alive despite a long battle with ALS.
Had Artest stayed with the Rockets, he'd still be swimming right now
The Houston Rockets took a curious path to the East Bay on Tuesday night. With the Bay Bridge closed down, the Rockets ended up taking a ferry from the San Francisco Airport to the Golden State Warriors' arena. Too bad Yao Ming is out for the season, or he could've laid down next to the Bay Bridge and let them cross.
If the M's ever make it, The Closer is making the same offer
A woman in Philly was so desperate for World Series tickets that she offered … shall we say, her pair to get a pair? Not sure whether someone took her up on the offer, but with the reputation that baseball players have in this area, The Closer thinks she could've skipped the information highway and made a deal in some hotel lobby.
Does this mean Joey Chesnut is donating 10 years' supply of Oscar Meyers?
Having got caught eating on the job, New York Jets quarterback Mark Sanchez tried to turn a negative into a positive by donating 500 hot dogs, hamburgers and buns to a soup kitchen in New Jersey. The big question now is when Mr. Whipple is going to make his charitable Charmin donation to said soup kitchen.
THE RUNDOWN
The Closer is so tired of feeling scorned by his lover named NBA that he's finally ready to move on. Part of the grieving process is denial. So, without further ado, here is The Bullpen's look at five things The Closer DOESN'T miss about having an NBA team in town:
5. The 7-foot lottery picks: If Seattle still had a team, the Sonics probably would have used a top-10 pick on a surfboard by now — provided it was seven feet long. The last few drafts were more about size than ability, and the pick-big-and-hope-one-of-'em-works-out philosophy resulted in … the OKC Thunder having to trade for Nenad Kristic. (By the way, has anyone noticed that the Stolen Thunder have used both their lotto picks on West Coast playmakers who know how to score and excite the crowd? That's better than paying money to watch tall guys line the bench.)
4. The Sonics' Boom Squad: Let's face it, most NBA arenas aren't known for their enthusiastic fans. But when these breakdancin' kids would take the floor two, sometimes, three times a game, you could've heard a pin drop. Wow, look at the kids spin on their heads. Look at the electric snake. Re-live the ‘80s. That's entertainment?
3. The nightly game of “if only they'd drafted …”: Bet Sonics fans wouldn't mind a starting five of Rajon Rondo, Rodney Stuckey, Josh Howard, David West and Al Jefferson … with David Lee and Glenn “Big Baby” Davis coming off the bench. Had they had their ducks in a row on a few draft nights, that lineup might still be playing at KeyArena.
2. The evolution of Robert Swift: The awkward, Richie Cunningham-looking kid from Bakersfield was supposed to blossom into an NBA All-Star. Instead, he seemed to gain a new tattoo and a worse hairdo every night. Had he stayed in Seattle, Swift would probably look like a combination of Ted Nugent and Dennis Rodman by now.
1. The growing pains: Let's face it, the NBA is 15 percent haves and 85 percent have-nots. The Sonics' last few seasons in Seattle looked remarkably similar to those of the San Diego/L.A. Clippers. After trading Shawn Kemp, then Gary Payton, then Ray Allen, then losing Rashard Lewis, the Sonics had the kind of nucleus that wouldn't even make Elgin Baylor green-and-gold with envy.
Contact The Closer at inthebullpen@heraldnet.com
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