Angry Birds

How about a Windows phone instead? Apple’s plans to begin selling its iPhone 4S in China on Friday were delayed in Beijing after huge crowds surrounded the Apple store there, raising concerns about safety. When the store didn’t open at 7 a.m., the crowd responded in anger, hurling eggs and shouting at employees.

Apple employees avoided harm by asking Siri to show them a good escape route.

Go directly to jail; do not pass Go: Two female inmates in the Aberdeen Jail tried to con guards into a trip to the hospital when one asked the other to hit her over the head with a cribbage board, then later hit herself with the game board and faked convulsions in the shower. Guards checked video to discover the attempted ruse.

To prevent further problems guards locked away the game boards for Clue, Chutes and Ladders, Twister and the Get Out of Jail Free card from Monopoly.

Combine and conquer: President Barack Obama wants fast-track authority to shrink the size of government by combining agencies, including Commerce and the Small Business Administration, among others.

Among the more popular suggestions was one to shut down Congress and pass on its duties to a file clerk with the National Endowment for the Arts.

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