Mountain Dew, it’s what’s for breakfast

The Morning Dew: The creative food forces at Taco Bell who brought you a taco with a Nacho Cheese Doritos shell have a new menu item for early risers: the breakfast soda. Mtn Dew A.M. is a mix of Mountain Dew pop and orange juice, perfect to wash down an A.M. Crunchwrap before you start your shift at Best Buy.

Domino’s, looking to attract the same young male clientele that Taco Bell’s morning Dew appeals to, is offering its Fratboy FastBreak: three slices of cold pepperoni pizza and a flat Red Bull.

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Always get it in writing: An Ann Arbor, Mich., man called police to complain that a private contractor he had hired online had changed her price after he paid the agreed-upon amount. The problem: The contractor was a prostitute who asked for more money after the, well, fact.

She was arrested. He was advised to file a complaint with the Better Oldest Profession Bureau.

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There’s always room for Jell-O: As part of the 50th anniversary of the Seattle World’s Fair, a group of artists was commissioned to construct a wall 5 feet high by 12 feet long of blocks of Jell-O set in gypsum mortar. Sadly, the wall slumped almost as quickly as it went up.

We blame poor choice of construction materials. The wall would have held longer if the Jell-O had been properly mixed in the Midwest fashion with shredded carrot, sliced celery, marshmellows, cottage cheese and mandarin oranges.

—Jon Bauer, Herald staff