A man of letters

A man of letters

Channel-surfing the vast cultural wasteland: David Letterman, now the longest-tenured talk show host on late-night TV has extended his contract with CBS and will remain at the “Late Show” until 2015, giving him a year to compete head-to-head with Jimmy Kimmel on ABC and Jimmy Fallon on NBC (Page B4).

Herewith, the Top 10 reasons Letterman is sticking around:

No. 10. Not tired of making jokes about not winning an Emmy each year.

No. 9. Doesn’t want the guilt of an unemployed Paul Shaffer on his conscience.

No. 8. Hasn’t even scratched the surface of Stupid Human Tricks.

No. 7. CBS’ great dental coverage.

No. 6. Only just recently nailed the pronunciation of his boss’ name, Leslie Moonves.

No. 5. Paul repeating punch lines never gets old.

No. 4. Needs an excuse to avoid joining Jay Leno for a road trip when he retires.

No. 3. Won’t run for public office; too many idiots in Congress as it is.

No. 2. Holding out hope for that elusive interview with Mitt Romney.

And the No. 1 reason David Letterman is sticking around: Kinda likes the idea of being the filling in a late-night Jimmy sandwich.

—Jon Bauer, Herald staff

Talk to us

> Give us your news tips.

> Send us a letter to the editor.

> More Herald contact information.

More in Opinion

toon
Editorial cartoons for Wednesday, April 24

A sketchy look at the news of the day.… Continue reading

Patricia Robles from Cazares Farms hands a bag to a patron at the Everett Farmers Market across from the Everett Station in Everett, Washington on Wednesday, June 14, 2023. (Annie Barker / The Herald)
Editorial: EBT program a boon for kids’ nutrition this summer

SUN Bucks will make sure kids eat better when they’re not in school for a free or reduced-price meal.

Burke: Even delayed, approval of aid to Ukraine a relief

Facing a threat to his post, the House Speaker allows a vote that Democrats had sought for months.

Harrop: It’s too easy to scam kids, with devastating consequences

Creeps are using social media to blackmail teens. It’s easier to fall for than you might think.

Don’t penalize those without shelter

Of the approximately 650,000 people that meet Housing and Urban Development’s definition… Continue reading

Fossil fuels burdening us with climate change, plastic waste

I believe that we in the U.S. have little idea of what… Continue reading

toon
Editorial: A policy wonk’s fight for a climate we can live with

An Earth Day conversation with Paul Roberts on climate change, hope and commitment.

Snow dusts the treeline near Heather Lake Trailhead in the area of a disputed logging project on Tuesday, April 11, 2023, outside Verlot, Washington. (Ryan Berry / The Herald)
Editorial: Move ahead with state forests’ carbon credit sales

A judge clears a state program to set aside forestland and sell carbon credits for climate efforts.

Comment: U.S. aid vital but won’t solve all of Ukraine’s worries

Russia can send more soldiers into battle than Ukraine, forcing hard choices for its leaders.

Comment: Jobs should be safe regardless of who’s providing labor

Our economy benefits from immigrants performing dangerous jobs. Society should respect that labor.

toon
Editorial cartoons for Tuesday, April 23

A sketchy look at the news of the day.… Continue reading

Comment: We have bigger worries than TikTok alone

Our media illiteracy is a threat because we don’t understand how social media apps use their users.

Support local journalism

If you value local news, make a gift now to support the trusted journalism you get in The Daily Herald. Donations processed in this system are not tax deductible.