For parents, ‘the good teacher’ will make all the difference

School stress is some of the worst stress there is, especially when you are a parent worrying about your child. Academic issues, friend drama, scuffles at recess, college acceptance letters; there are multiple strains of torment, but only one balm — getting “the good teacher.”

Our leaders in Olympia, with their infinite wisdom, are trying to help all kids get “the good” teacher. The Teacher/Principal Evaluation Project is supposed to identify poor instructors. What it means in actual practice is up for debate.

You know, and I know, that a binder of TPEP statistics can’t tell you squat compared to a parent’s judge of a teacher’s merit.

It’s that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach when you know — you just know — that the teacher genuinely cares about your child. In fact, she doesn’t merely care about your child, she genuinely likes your child, even though there are a lot of times when your child does unlikable things.

When you see a real connection between your child and his or her teacher something significant forms: trust. You know the teacher will do whatever it takes to help your child. You are positive the teacher has your son or daughter’s best interests at heart. When the teacher sends an email, you read it. When they call you on the phone to talk about a disciplinary situation, you back the teacher up 100 percent.

The best part of having “the good teacher” is that every day when you send your kid off to school you can relax. You feel calm knowing that the piece of your heart that walks around in blue jeans and muddy sneakers is safe. You have peace because the teacher wants your child to succeed almost as much as you do.

Sadly, the opposite is also true. When you feel like a teacher doesn’t like or “get” your child, it makes you feel sick inside. It doesn’t matter what the teacher says or does. Years of experience don’t impress you. Classroom newsletters make you tense.

Instead of noticing examples of quality instruction, you focus on the ways the teacher did your child wrong. The stress builds up bigger and bigger and you count the days until summer.

It can be hard to remember that teachers are humans too. They have good years and bad years. Sometimes they struggle with health issues or time constraints at home that can’t be helped. It’s difficult to be patient with every child.

This spring many schools ask parents to fill out intake forms for the following year. Parents write about their child’s strengths and weakness and describe what type of learning environment would be best next year.

Rarely, if ever, do schools allow moms and dads to request specific teachers. Instead, parents must pin their hopes on carefully worded replies.

You can’t ask for “the good” teacher. All you can do is hope that initiatives like TPEP don’t drive her away from teaching.

Jennifer Bardsley is an Edmonds mom of two. Find her on Twitter @jennbardsley and at www.heraldnet.com/ibrakeformoms and teachingmybabytoread.com.

Talk to us

> Give us your news tips.

> Send us a letter to the editor.

> More Herald contact information.

More in Life

Brandon Hailey of Cytrus, center, plays the saxophone during a headlining show at Madam Lou’s on Friday, Dec. 29, 2023 in Seattle, Washington. (Olivia Vanni / The Herald)
Lynnwood-based funk octet Cytrus has the juice

Resilience and brotherhood take center stage with ‘friends-first’ band.

FILE - In this April 11, 2014 file photo, Neko Case performs at the Coachella Music and Arts Festival in Indio, Calif. Fire investigators are looking for the cause of a fire on Monday, Sept. 18, 2017, that heavily damaged Case’s 225-year-old Vermont home. There were no injuries, though a barn was destroyed. It took firefighters two hours to extinguish the blaze. (Photo by Scott Roth/Invision/AP, File)
Music, theater and more: What’s happening in Snohomish County

Singer-songwriter Neko Case, an indie music icon from Tacoma, performs Sunday in Edmonds.

Dominic Arizona Bonuccelli
Tangier’s market boasts piles of fruits, veggies, and olives, countless varieties of bread, and nonperishables, like clothing and electronics.
Rick Steves on the cultural kaleidoscope of Tangier in Morocco

Walking through the city, I think to myself, “How could anyone be in southern Spain — so close — and not hop over to experience this wonderland?”

chris elliott.
Vrbo promised to cover her rental bill in Hawaii, so why won’t it?

When Cheryl Mander’s Vrbo rental in Hawaii is uninhabitable, the rental platform agrees to cover her new accommodations. But then it backs out. What happened?

The Moonlight Swing Orchestra will play classic sounds of the Big Band Era on April 21 in Everett. (submitted photo)
Music, theater and more: What’s happening in Snohomish County

Relive the Big Band Era at the Port Gardner Music Society’s final concert of the season in Everett.

2024 Honda Ridgeline TrailSport AWD (Honda)
2024 Honda Ridgeline TrailSport AWD

Honda cedes big boy pickup trucks to the likes of Ford, Dodge… Continue reading

Would you want to give something as elaborate as this a name as mundane as “bread box”? A French Provincial piece practically demands the French name panetiere.
A panetiere isn’t your modern bread box. It’s a treasure of French culture

This elaborately carved French antique may be old, but it’s still capable of keeping its leavened contents perfectly fresh.

(Judy Newton / Great Plant Picks)
Great Plant Pick: Mouse plant

What: Arisarum proboscideum, also known as mouse plant, is an herbaceous woodland… Continue reading

Bright green Japanese maple leaves are illuminated by spring sunlight. (Getty Images)
Confessions of a ‘plantophile’: I’m a bit of a junky for Japanese maples

In fact, my addiction to these glorious, all-season specimens seems to be contagious. Fortunately, there’s no known cure.

2024 Hyundai IONIQ 6 Limited (Hyundai)
2024 Hyundai IONIQ 6 Limited

The 2024 Hyundai IONIQ 6 Limited is a sporty, all-electric, all-wheel drive sedan that will quickly win your heart.

The 2024 Dodge Hornet R/T hybrid’s face has the twin red lines signifying the brand’s focus on performance. (Dodge)
2024 Hornet R/T is first electrified performance vehicle from Dodge

The all-new compact SUV travels 32 miles on pure electric power, and up to 360 miles in hybrid mode.

Don’t blow a bundle on glass supposedly made by the Henry William Stiegel

Why? Faked signatures, reused molds and imitated styles can make it unclear who actually made any given piece of glass.

Support local journalism

If you value local news, make a gift now to support the trusted journalism you get in The Daily Herald. Donations processed in this system are not tax deductible.