Pills of the opioid oxycodone-acetaminophen. (AP Photo/Patrick Sison)

Pills of the opioid oxycodone-acetaminophen. (AP Photo/Patrick Sison)

New support group for those whose loved ones battle opioids

“I remember when my dad told me that every time our family member relapses, we relapse.”

SILVANA — Anyone who loves someone affected by opioid addiction is invited to a gathering at a local cafe Tuesday evening.

Opioid Affected Families of Snohomish County plans its first big get-together at Willow and Jim’s Country Cafe, 1421 Pioneer Highway. It starts at 6 p.m.

Carly Payne, 25, grew up on Camano Island and now calls Stanwood home. A family member has been battling heroin addiction for about four years, she said. At first, she coped by keeping busy. She didn’t talk about it much.

“When I finally started reaching out to people instead of keeping to myself, I started talking to friends and really close coworkers,” she said. “How many times did I hear, ‘Oh, yeah, me too.’ It just opens a floodgate when you start talking about it.”

That got her thinking: Why weren’t there more opportunities in the area for people to talk about how opioid addiction has affected their families? There are support groups to help people fighting to beat addiction, and those are essential, she said. But there should be places for their loved ones, too.

“I remember when my dad told me that every time our family member relapses, we relapse,” she said.

The goal is to give people a safe space to share their stories with others who understand. There’s a stigma around addiction, not just for the addicts but also those close to them, Payne said. She wants to overcome it.

The gathering Tuesday is open to anyone with a family member or friend affected by the opioid crisis. The team that started Opioid Affected Families a couple of months ago plans to share information from the Snohomish County Sheriff’s Office. There will be time to visit and make plans.

The group started small while Payne and others decided what direction they wanted to go in. Now they know.

“The biggest thing is we want to be an information hub and support group,” Payne said. “There are people who are in this community who are dealing with this who don’t really talk about it. Honestly, that’s not the healthy way to go. We need to talk about it.”

If there’s enough interest, she’d like to plan service activities. She’s considered a stand at the Stanwood Camano Fair, or a spring cleaning of a park or trail. It would be a way to help the community while giving people a chance to spend time with others who understand their struggles.

When Payne started talking to people, it turned into a chance to listen, too. She realized that her family isn’t alone in how they have been affected by opioid addiction.

People see evidence of the crisis — panhandlers, garbage, abandoned needles. They don’t see what happens in the lives of those who care deeply about an addict.

“You have family members and friends who really care about these people,” Payne said. “Even if they’ve reached a point where they can’t have them in their lives any more, they still love them so much.”

Kari Bray: 425-339-3439; kbray@heraldnet.com.

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